Swapped
by Autumn810
Summary: It all started on a super boring day for Aeris and Zack in the Lifestream... Things went a little wacko from there.
1. Boreddd

**SO THIS IS ANOTHER STRANGE THING I FOUND ON MY COMPUTER... AND THIS TIME, I SERIOUSLY MEAN IT; IT'S _STRANGE._**

"I'm bored," Aeris groaned, propping her chin on her palm. Her elbow hurt from being pushed against the control panel next to Zack, but she really didn't care. She was _that_ bored. With a yawn, the brunette looked over that the black haired man at her side. He looked back at her with a grin.

"Why? This is fun!" His forefinger hit the blue button in front of him labeled 'Die'. The person eating cereal on the screen before them paused mid bite and fell face forward into their bowl, dead. Aeris rolled her eyes, pushing the white button before her labeled 'Live'. The person jolted awake, milk dripping down their face and a Cheerio in their nose. "See?!"

"No," she huffed, toe tapping against the floor rapidly. Some days, he _really_ got on her nerves. "Tifa's holding that reunion at her place again this year."

"Aw, we're not invited?" He scrolled through the wide camera view of people. He stopped on a fat man picking his nose, a hot dog in his other hand. Chuckling, the soldier hit his button, the man falling and his chubby phalange getting stuck up his nostril.

"Zack, _please,"_ she huffed, granting him life once again. The poor guy sadly looked at his smooshed, dirt covered lunch and waddled away. "And of course not. We're _dead."_

"That doesn't mean we can't make an appearance." Confused, Aeris frowned at him with a tilted head. Zack beamed, happy to finally have the chance to make the best prank _ever!_ Even Reno couldn't top this one... "We could make them switch bodies for a day."

"Or a few," Aeris smiled evilly. "Besides, they all think the others have it so easy. Maybe this will stop their whining."

"Let's do it!" Zack cheered, fist pumping. "Tonight when they all go to bed!"

Tifa hurried around her kitchen, rushing to prepare drinks and food for the little get together that night. Reunions were for Sephiroth. Yuffie yawned, bored out of her little ninja mind. In the corner, Marlene and Denzel scribbled on pieces of paper, drawing the members of Avalanche as well as young children can. Barret's adopted daughter put two very very _very_ slight triangles under Vincent's lips, smiling back at the crayon drawing.

The back door opened and in came Cloud, blonde hair tousled from the wind. He raised a blonde eyebrow at the bustling woman behind the counter before shaking his head and looking toward the kids.

"Cloud!" Denzel exclaimed, running toward him and yanking him into a tight hug. The blonde tolerated the hold until the the boy let go and went back to coloring. Yuffie took a sip out of Marlene's abandoned juice box and jerked her head up toward him.

"Sup?"

"... Not much. You gonna help her?"

"Are _you?"_ Both of them looked at Tifa and cringed as she viciously beat a washcloth against the counter because it smelled like mildew.

"I'll pass." Cloud finally answered.

"Then so will I."

The blonde delivery boy slowly picked his way up the stairs, stopping in his room and setting his blade against the wall. He frowned at the extra mattress on his floor; he didn't really feel like sharing with anyone tonight, but he certainly hoped that if he got stuck with anyone, it was either Vincent or Nanaki. A shadow outside his window caught his eye, but when he looked, there was nothing. _I_ _swear_ _I_ _saw_ _a_ _little_ _pink just then..._

Cid sighed, content with sitting in the back and having his cigarette. Shera and her friends were back at the house having tea, and for once, he didn't mind. At least he had the woman off his back for the next few days. _ &$+_ _wife._ Barret laughed loudly across the bar, ignoring Vincent's disapproving scowl. Cloud quietly laughed next to the big man, the three staring at Marlene's gift to 'Uncle Vinnie'.

"You are all so _unbearable!"_ Yuffie shrieked. "I can't believe no one brought materia!"

"Yeah, cuz you would _steal_ it," Barret retorted. She glared at him before sulking under a table, mumbling to herself miserably. Tifa frowned when she noticed the absence of a friend.

"Where's Reeve?"

"He couldn't make it tonight. Said he had some commissioner stuff to do," Cloud shrugged.

"Oh," she huffed. "I told him to take the time off."

"He runs a company," Vincent replied lowly. "I'm sure he did not mean for this to happen."

"Hey, you finally said somethin', Vamps," Barret yelled. Marlene rolled her eyes and leaned closer to Cid.

"Think he drank too much dizzy juice, Mr. Cid."

"How many times to I gotta tell ya that it's just Cid?" The pilot chuckled, ruffling her hair. _Dizzy_ _juice?_ _Cute._ "Hey Teef! Get me some 'dizzy juice'!"

"Get you some what?" Her eyebrows drew together over her burgundy eyes. Marlene giggled and hugged Cid tightly before running to say goodnight to everyone else.

"Nothin', kid. Don't worry about it." He kicked back in his seat, simply enjoying his smoke.

"Night everybody!" Denzel called from the top of the stairs, Yuffie waving both hands over her head and Tifa blowing a kiss. Marlene kissed her father's cheek before running up after him.

"Night," Cloud grumbled.

"Sleep tight, kids!" Tifa added. She looked forward toward her friends again, giving the counter a half hearted scrub. "I'm exhausted. I think I'll turn in too."

"G'night Teef," Cid acknowledged, though he was secretly wondering if Shera's giggle squad had burned his house down yet. _-%+!_ _Don't_ _think_ _about_ _it!_

One by one, the members of Avalanche went to bed, each sharing a room with someone. The Seventh Heaven was a bar, not an inn, but there where still bedrooms in the narrow halls. Yuffie pushed her back against Tifa's, the friends struggling to stay warm due to the lack of a large blanket. Cid grunted as his back popped when he laid down on the floor mattress in Barret's room.

"Gettin' too old for this -%+," he grumbled. Barret chuckled.

"If you're old, then what 'm I?"

"Energetic," Cid waved his hand dismissively.

Across the hall, Nanaki snoozed in the hallway, perfectly content on any floor. Inside the door he rested behind, Cloud kicked off his boots and rolled up in his thin covers, Vincent merely sitting against the wall with his rear on his own mattress. Even the seemingly indestructible man was tired, eyelids falling shut as his forehead fell against his raised knees. _That's_ _gonna_ _hurt_ _in th_ _e_ _morning,_ Cloud though, cringing when he noticed his friend's position. Then he shrugged. _Oh_ _well._ _At_ _least_ _Vincent_ _isn't_ _a_ _complainer._

Zack snickered upon seeing the oblivious people dozing off. They had no idea what was in store. Aeris smiled down at her checklist. _Him_ _to_ _her_ _and_ _she_ _to_ _he..._ _Oh_ _Cid!_ _I_ _feel_ _bad_ _for_ _you!_

"Shall we get to work?" She asked innocently. Her black haired friend merely laughed and walked over to Yuffie.

"I can't wait to see their faces."

 **THIS** **IS** **REALLY** **RANDOM...** **AND** **IT'S** **ALSO** **WHAT** **HAPPENS** **WHEN** **I** **HAVE** **WRITER'S** **BLOCK** **OR** **I** **JUST** **CAN'T** **COME** **UP** **WIH** **ANY** **NEW** **STORIES.** **IT W** **ON'T** **LAST** **LONG,** **MAYBE** **FIVE CHAPTERS** **AT** **THE** **MOST.** **IT** **ALSO** **MIGHT** **BE** **KINDA** **CONFUSING** **NEXT** **CHAPTER,** **SO** **LET** **ME** **CLEAR** **THIS** **UP** **HERE.**

 **WHEN** **I** **SAY** **SOMEONE'S** **NAME** **FROM** **ANOTHER** **PERSON'S** **POV,** **THAT** **MEANS** **THEY'RE** **REFERRING** **TO** **THE** **PHYSICAL** **PERSON,** **NOT** **THE** **PERSON..** **INSIDE.** **LET** **ME** **GIVE** **YOU** **AN** **EXAMPLE.**

 **LET'S** **SAY** **THAT** **CLOUD** **TURNS** **INTO** **YUFFIE.**

 **'CID** **GLARED** **OVER** **AT** **YUFFIE,** **ANNOYED** **BY** **HER** **SUDDEN** **SWORD** **TALK.'** **WHEN** **IT'S** **CLOUD'S** **POV,** **HE** **WILL** **BE** **REFERRED** **TO AS** **CLOUD,** **BUT** **ON** **THE** **OUTSIDE,** **BECAUSE** **THE** **OTHERS** **SEE** **YUFFIE,** **THEY** **WILL** **REFER** **TO** **HIM** **AS** **YUFFIE.** **GOT** **IT?**

 **DON'T** **WORRY,** **CLOUD'S** **NOT** **GONNA** **BE** **YUFFIE...** **NO,** **I** **HAVE** **MUCH** **MORE** **EVIL** **PLANS** **TEE-HEE**


	2. Swapped

Vincent woke up with a start, blink his eyes open. Rather, eye. The other seemed to be stuck for some odd reason. He frowned and looked down at the flooring that happened to be inches from his face. _I_ _didn't_ _fall_ _asleep_ _on_ _the_ _floor..._ His confusion grew when he saw other doors and a staircase. _Or_ _in_ _the_ _hallway._ Irritated, he reached up to touch his eye only to give a slight gasp and jump backward. He looked down at his two large paws with his eye widened. Putting two and two together, he looked behind him to see a flaming tail and tattoos. _-#+..._

Cid groaned upon waking up, the sunlight bugging the heck out of his eyes. A warm body was behind him, breathing steadily. Nothing out of the ordinary. _Guess_ _Sher_ _decided_ _to_ _sleep_ _in_ _today._ A content smirk crossing his face, he rolled over and flopped his arm over his wife, pulling her warmth closer to him. _Smells_ _like_ _pine_ _trees._ _Rice..?_ His eyes jerked open and he literally fell off the bed.

"Ah -+%! What're you doing, Brat?!" Something caught his eye and he stared down, wide eyed. In any other situation, Cid Highwind would have been considered a pervert, but that black zip up shirt seemed familiar. _What_ _the..?_ "Boobs!?"

Nanaki blinked awake, only to see Tifa laying on the floor and staring at her chest in bewilderment. _I_ _wonder_ _what's_ _happened._ Yawing, he pushed himself up to his feet, shaking his head to loosen his mane. Mane? What mane? He blinked and looked down. _Hands?_ _Feet?_ He looked behind him to see khaki shorts sticking up in the air. _No_ _wonder_ _my_ _rear_ _felt_ _higher_ _than_ _usual..._ Looking down at Tifa, who simply stared at him in confusion, he carefully sat down as well as he knew a human could. Then he caught his reflection. _Yuffie?!_

Yuffie's eyes fluttered open, only to realize that she wasn't where she fell asleep. Shrugging it off, she sat up and yawned, stretching her arms. _Ouch!_ One of the bones in her back cracked, another in her left arm. Wincing, she got to her feet to see Barret snoozing on the bed nearby. _Tifa_ _probably_ _carried_ _me_ _here_ _when_ _she_ _didn't_ _have_ _enough_ _room,_ _the_ _-%+^._ She huffed when her bladder felt like it was going to explode if she didn't take a pee, walking outside the bedroom and hurrying to the bathroom. She didn't even notice Nanaki, who sat outside twitching whenever his fur brushed a whisker or when he caught sight of his flaming tail. She did notice, however, her reflection. Her stubbly jaw fell slack as she took in the blue eyes, light blonde hair, and tanned skin. Then she screamed in a manly voice.

Barret grumbled tiredly in the morning sun. _It's_ _so_ _ &$+ __hot_ _in_ _here..._ He opened his eyes only to see blackness and to feel his back and neck aching terribly from his position. Wincing, he forced himself to sit up, only to stare at the unhealthily skinny legs propped up in front of him, clothed in black leather. _What_ _the..?_ He looked down to his left hand to see a golden claw, red fabric spread out behind him. He took a deep breath and stood, feeling a lot smaller than his usual self. _Just_ _a_ _dream,_ _I_ _think._ He nodded to himself and took a deep breath before punching himself into the face as hard as he could. With black spots invading his vision, he quickly came to the decision that this was definitely _not_ a dream.

Cloud awake to a scream that sounded suspiciously like Cid's. Rolling his eyes, he pushed himself out of bed. _Wow..._ _I'm_ _heavy?_ He looked down and blinked. Was he dreaming? Hallucinating more likely... Nodding, he continued walking down the hall. _Am_ _I_ _really_ _tall_ _today_ _or_ _something?_ Right on cue, he hit his face on the top of the doorway.

"Ow!" _Big_ _meaty_ _fingers..._ _And_ _is_ _that_ _a_ _beard?!_ He grimaced. _I'm_ _going_ _crazy._ Then he continued toward the bathroom. Cid stood there gaping at himself in the mirror.

"I'm a _guy!"_ He shrieked. Cloud blinked at him.

"... Yes?"

"Barret! Who am I!?" The blonde pleaded, grabbing Cloud's shoulders. _Barret?_ _I_ _ **am**_ _taller_ _than_ _him_ _now..._ A smirk crossed his face slowly as he looked at his reflection. _Time_ _for_ _me_ _to_ _avenge_ _all_ _the_ _short_ _people._

"Yeah. I'm Barret."

"Not you, retard!"

Tifa was the last to wake up, rolling over and frowning at Vincent where he was on the ground, blinking unsteadily at his hand.

"Vincent, are you alright?"

"Who?" He looked up. "I'm not Vincent." He frowned. "I'm not. I'm _not! -$+_ I can't say it!"

"Vincent?"

"Shut up, Cloud!" Vincent snapped. She sighed and stood. _What's_ _wrong_ _with_ _ **him?**_ Then she went into the bathroom attached to Cloud's bedroom... _Um..._

"Wait.." She whispered, looking down at her bare chest. "I'm Cloud..." She looked up again and stared at her reflection. _Might_ _as_ _well_ _fix_ _this_ _hair..._

 **TOLD** **YOU** **GUYS** **THIS** **STUFF** **IS** **SHORT** **LAZINESS!** **IT'S** **ALSO** **ALMOST** **11** **PM** **AND** **I** **HAVE** **TO** **WORK** _ **TWICE**_ **TOMORROW** **,** **BUT** **I'M** **SO** **ADDICTED** **TO** **MY** **FAILED** **ATTEMPT** **AT** **HUMOR THAT** **I'M** **NOT** **TIRED.**


	3. Playing the Part

Vincent was growing agrivated. Any time something touched his blasted whiskers, it make him twitch like a cat getting sprayed with water. _I must be the only one out of sorts,_ he thought, watching Barret walk by and talk to a yelling Cid. Tifa stumbled out of her room with Yuffie behind her, though the ninja was having a hard time walking upright. _Her leg must have fallen asleep._ She finally gave up on walking and just crawled across the floor. Her gray eyes caught his single one and stared. _I must play the part of Nanaki, I suppose. At least until this strange event passes over._

Coincidentally, everyone else in Avalanche seemed to have the same idea. Sort of. They simply thought they wouldn't day anything. This made Aeris giggle. _Poor guys. They have no idea how weird the day is gonna be._

Cid muttered as he walked down the stairs, even shorter than his short self. Yuffie trailed behind him, crawling like a little demon possessed child. Eventually, everyone made it downstairs, Barret sitting at the bar counter.

"Whatchya got for breakfast, Teef?"

"I'm not a chef!" He glared at Barret. The dark man raised an eyebrow and Cid gulped. _Right. I'm the frikin' woman for the day._ "Er, I mean, I'll get you something in a moment." Nanaki tried to get onto his hind legs for some reason and wound up stumbling into Vincent, knocking them both to the floor.

"What the -%+?!" The red cloaked man yelled, startling everyone. Yuffie blinked at him and Cloud drew back a little, Nanaki frowning at him.

"Tifa, the eggs are on fire," the fire cat finally said.

"What?!" He shrieked, jumping away from the flaming stove. "What the -%( do I do?!"

"I got it!" Cloud jumped over the counter, dumping a crap load of baking soda on the pan. "There we go! I'll show you how to do it right!"

"Um... That's okay," Cid backed away, turning to a confused bunch of Avalanche members and crossing his arms over his large chest. "What?"

"Nothing," someone chirped. Cid frowned. _Is that..._ _ **My**_ _body? Who the heck's in there?!_ "I'm, uh, gonna go... Y'know, stare at my ship because it's really pretty." He mentally face palmed. Whoever it was was doing a terrible impression of him.

Cloud watched his body cook everyone's breakfast expertly, wondering how on earth he was doing it. _And who's in there anyway? My subconscious?_ Cid left the bar, singing something about materia under his breath. _Strange._ Smirking, he stood, thumping over to Yuffie. She crawled toward him with an eyebrow raised.

"Hello, Barret. Did you need something?" Cloud blinked at her. _What the heck?_

"No."

"I see. Perhaps we can speak later then," she shrugged and turned the other way, crawling to Vincent. Cloud huffed and looked up at the ceiling. _What in the name of Aeris is going on?_

Tifa left quickly to let Avalanche eat while she went upstairs. _Finally, I can change this rediculous hair..._ She smiled to herself and grabbed her comb off of her dresser, parting Cloud's soft blonde hair a little to the right and brushing down. When she was finished, she had to fight a giggle. _He looks like a dork. I should probably fix it..._ She hurried to grab some of his gel, trying to spike his hair up again, but it fell limp. _Oh no..._

Barret huffed as Yuffie crawled toward him. Was she here to bother him like she always bothered her "Vinnie"?

"Pst. Vincent," she whispered. "It's me, Nanaki."

"Go away, Brat," he huffed.

"But.."

"Go, before I club you with my gun!" The ninja yelped and crawled away, wincing as her knees were starting to go raw.

~•~

At that moment, Reeve pushed into the Seventh Heaven to see Cloud creeping down the stairs with his blonde hair falling around his shoulders unevenly, Barret reading a magazine about broadswords, Yuffie crawling like a possessed person, Nanaki twitching, Vincent curiously twisting pieces of his claw, and Tifa talking nonstop about space to absolutely nothing. He blinked at them all, shrugging before stepping inside.

"How is everyone?"

"Reeve!" Cloud squealed, running toward him and hugging him tightly.

"Reevie!" Cid entered behind him, crushing him as well.

"Er..." Reeve blinked. Tifa just gave him a halfhearted wave before talking to herself again, Yuffie nodding his way, and Barret pretending he didn't exist. "Nice to see you all."

"I know! And I got a new materia the other day, just for you!" Cid whooped, running up the stairs with wheezy breath.

"Excuse me?"

"I'm so glad you could make it Reeve," Cloud smiled widely. Confused, the commissioner stared at the blonde as he walked away.

"What exactly is going on here?" He demanded.

"A partay!" Cid jumped back down the stairs.

"I see..." _Something seems incorrect... Cid's acting like Yuffie, Cloud is acting like Tifa, Tifa's muttering about planes and such, and Vincent's talking nonstop, which seems to be scaring Nanaki. Hmm. I have a way to test this out..._ "Tifa, we seem to be missing food," Reeve smiled politely, motioning to the rather empty pantry. Tifa looked up after maybe ten seconds.

"Huh?"

"I think it's time to go grocery shopping," the commissioner smirked with his head cocked to the side. "Maybe you could take Yuffie. Oh, and Cid, I need you to take a look at my car, the engine is making a _terrible_ noise. Marlene, how _are_ you? Why don't you go say hello to your father? Vincent, I need you to go pick up your new assignment from the WRO HQ."

"Sure thing," Vincent huffed suspiciously. _Clue number one._

Cid looked up at the shelves in the store, blinking at the list in his hand. Heck, Shera did all this crap back at home. The only thing he knew how to shop for was tools. That and all that mechanic crap, oils, engines, and gas and stuff. Yuffie's wobbly legs left her walking unsteadily behind him, her eyes wide as she looked around.

"You alright, Brat?"

"I've never been inside a shopping center before," she mused quietly. Cid frowned.

"What're you talking about?"

"Nevermind, Tifa. What's next on the list?"

"Uh... I don't know, I can't read this," he shrugged.

"Let me see," Yuffie reached up, fingers taking a couple tries to grab the paper. "That says tampons."

"Um.."

"Er..."

"How about we just skip that one?" The transformed pilot suggested.

"Let's," Yuffie nodded eagerly.

~•~

Yuffie stared helplessly at the hood of Reeve's car. _Shoot... How the heck does the old fart do it?_ She yanked the top open, grimacing at the smell, and helplessly poked a chunk of metal.

"Can you see what's wrong?" Reeve asked in a light tone, sounding somewhat like he was mocking her. _Should I tell him? But then everyone'll blame me for something!_

"Uh... Yeah! Yer engine's lonely, so it, er, needs a friend..?"

"... What?"

"You know. A friend," she grinned. Reeve sighed and stroked his goatee thoughtfully. He was onto her, she just knew it.

"Alright. Why don't you come inside then? I'd like to talk to you all about something when Tifa and Yuffie get back." _Yup. He's onto m- Hey, is that a Bahamut materia?!_

~•~

Barret waltzed into the WRO Headquarters, feeling strangely light and, well, shorter than usual. And he could see better. _Way_ better. So much that it creeped the normally big, burly man out. _Where the heck do I pick up an assignment?_ A tall, thin woman with glasses and a stack of papers walked past him and he hurried to catch up.

"Hey! Where do I get my assignment?!" She jumped, staring at the suddenly very loud and rude Vincent Valentine.

"Excuse me, Sir?"

"Assignment pick up. Where is it?" He demanded again. How on planet Gaia did Vampy do his everyday?

"Mr. Valentine, there _is_ no assignment for you," she answered quietly, quite scared that the end of the world was coming soon. This man had never even opened his mouth around her, and now he was yelling and waving his arms everywhere? "Y-You requested vacation time for this weekend, remember?"

"What the..!" Barret released a yell that sounded like a roar and stomped out of the building, leaving the poor secretary to push up her glasses and keep walking. Barret grumbled to his new self all the way back to Seventh Heaven. He was going to give Reeve a piece of his mind.

 **LONGER THAN THE LAST TWO... IT'S SO WEIRD HOW MUCH FUN IT IS TO NOT ACTUALLY HAVE A STORY LINE AND JUST MAKE CRAP UP AS I GO... SERIOUSLY, THE NOTE PAD FOR** _ **VIOLET SHADOWS**_ **ON MY PHONE IS OVER 8,000 WORDS LONG. FOR THIS ONE? IT'S LIKE 25 XD**


	4. Normality

Aeris sighed as she watched Reeve slowly piece everything together. She _knew_ they should've gotten the commissioner regardless of where he had been. Now their fun was going to be ruined. At least the confusion that was going to follow would be entertaining. Being dead wasn't the greatest thing when all you did was press a button to counter your boyfriend's slip ups.

Everyone was gathered in the Seventh Heaven, angrily chatting amongst themselves or giggling. Well, Cloud was giggling anyway. Reeve raised an eyebrow at the shaggy haired blonde and pulled out a piece of paper and a pen.

"Alright, everyone be quiet, please," he instructed calmly. However, no one listened to him. So, rolling his crimson eyes, Vincent opened his mouth.

"Yo! Reeve's talking to you all, so shut up!" Everyone clamped their mouths shut instantly, still wondering what the supposed vampire was on.

"Thank you, Vincent. Now, I would like to know what's going in here."

"What do you mean?" Yuffie tilted her head before picking up her foot and scrubbing her cheek with her toes. _Bizarre._ Chuckling, he clicked the tip of his pen out.

"Yuffie, you are acting a tad like Nanaki. Care to explain?" The ninja grew red and looked around awkwardly. "And Cloud, what have you done with your hair?" Barret's head snapped up and his jaw dropped, taking in the absence of blonde spikes. "Vincent? You are being rather loud today..."

"Alright, I give up!" The cloaked man snapped. "I'm actually Barret, alright? I've got no idea what the heck is goin on."

" _You_ are me?" Nanak i growled at him. "If you have done anything with Galian..." Reeve smiled victoriously and scribbled down a couple notes.

 _Vincent=Barret_

 _Nanaki=Vincent_

"At least I know someone has been taking good care of my body," Yuffie sighed with relief.

 _Yuffie=Nanaki_

"Hold up, _Red_ was me along?! I new it!" Cid jumped up and down, pointing a finger at the small girl.

 _Cid=Yuffi_ e

"The Brat?!" Tifa groaned. "Cmon guys, I don't want breasts anymore."

 _Tifa=Cid_

"What's that supposed to mean?!" Cloud demanded, hands on his hips. "You're a freaking pervert, whoever you are!"

 _Cloud=Tifa_

"What have you done to my hair?" Barret wailed, sobbing into mismatched hands.

 _Barret=Clou_ d

"No way," Barret shook his head quickly. "There is _no_ way you're me, Spike."

"I've got it," Reeve cleared his throat, standing. "Are you ready?"

"Just get on with it!" 'Tifa' thundered.

"Alright. Vincent is actually Barret, Nanaki is actually Vincent, Yuffie is actually Nanaki, Cid is actually Yuffie, Tifa is actually Cid, Cloud is actually Tifa, and Barret is actually Cloud."

"You hurt my brian," Cid wailed, laying stomach-up on a bench seat, head hanging upside down off the edge of the bed.

"But who mixed us up like this?" Cloud crossed his arms.

"A supernatural power, most likely," Reeve shrugged.

"None of your nonsense helped," Vincent narrowed his eyes.

"Oh, is your attention span the size of a gold fish's, _Yuffie,"_ Tifa glared at him.

"I ain't Yuffie!" Vincent thundered. Then his face softened. "I said it!"

"It it it it it it it it it it," Cid sang, skipping around the small bar.

"Look, we need to find a way to reverse this," Yuffie pointed out.

"I agree," Nanaki nodded, face twitching uncontrollably when Cid's pant leg repeatedly brushed his whiskers.

"Cloud, stop kicking me!" Cloud shrieked as Tifa irritably poked his leg with her boot.

"I ain't Cloud! I'm Cid!" Tifa scowled.

"No, Nanaki's Cid!" Cloud fired back.

"I thought Vincent was Cid!" Cid offered.

"No, Vincent's Barret!" Tifa shook her head.

"Then who's Cid..?" Nanaki frowned.

"I thought _I_ was Cid!" Barret threw his hands in the air.

"No, you're Cloud!" Cid groaned.

"Oh yeah! I am!"

"Then who's Cid!?"

"I'm Marlene!"

"Marlene ain't part a' this, foo's!"

"Wait, so am I Denzel?!"

"Shut up, Barret!"

"I'm Peter!"

"Cloud..."

"No, wait, I'm a..."

"Excuse me, I'll handle this," a voice called over the loud arguing. They all looked up in confusion as Aeris climbed on top of a table. "Zack and I got bored because we weren't invited last night, so we changed you all for the day."

"You little..!" Vincent growled.

"Don't worry," the Ancient smiled softly. "You could always stay that way, Barret."

"No!" Both Vincent and Nanaki yelled their protest at the same time.

"Good. Now, close your eyes, all of you." They all hesitantly obeyed, and Aeris smirked, motioning for Zack to come out. "This may tickle in some spots, and even feel wet and smell badly for a few moments, but I assure you that as long as your eyes remain closed, everything will be alright." With lightning speed, the black haired man drew on all of them with a permanent marker. A mustache here, a goatee there, a scribbled mask around Yuffie's eyes, etcetera. When he was finished, he vanished with a wink and Aeris forced a giggle down, turning them all back to their normal selves- leaving the marker, of course. Then she too disappeared.

"Yes!" Cid whooped, glad to be normal again. Barret joined him, Vincent giving a heavy sigh of relief with a small smile on his lips. Cloud hugged himself tightly, still sobbing over his ruined hairdo. Tifa did a little bouncy dance with Yuffie. Nanaki yawned happily. Reeve smiled and tucked his notes away. Of course, nobody said anything about the doodles on each other's faces. They had a feeling that if they did, the dead might come back and treat them to being wild animals for the day or something, not that Nanaki would be bothered...

Back in the Lifestream, Aeris revived someone Zack randomly killed. With a heavy sigh and then a mighty yawn, she propped her chin up on her palm again.

"I'm booooooored."

The next day, Rude awoke as normal only to notice that he wasn't in his own bed. His uniforms were dirty and strewn about the bedroom floor, the bed smelled too heavily of cheap perfume, and something soft kept brushing his bare back when he stood. No matter how hard he tried to see the tickly object, he couldn't, and just wound up spinning like a dog chasing its tail until he got dizzy and wandered into the bathroom. _Oh_ _no..._

 **THE** **END!** **THIS** **THING** **WAS** **SO** **STRANGLY** **FUN,** **EVEN** **IF** **IT'S** **REALLY** **CONFUSING** **AND** **NO** **ONE** **EVER** **READ S** **IT** **XD** **I** **THINK** **I'M** **CURED** **OF** **MY** **WRITER'S** **BLOCK** **TOO!** **YAY!** **LOVE** **Y'ALL!**


End file.
